Friends are important to all of us, but in the life of children, friends are more important than anything else. Whether or not they are understood with friends, friends are indispensable and always exist. Friendship relationships affect children emotionally-socially and mentally and help them develop their personalities. With age, the content of friendship becomes more complex, and friends become more than just a play partner for children and become a life partner. Of course, when this happens, different situations occur in friendship and children develop according to these situations.
Now let's look at these situations where children are living with their friends…
1. Playing games with friends:
Playmate, which is important for the socialization of young children, is one of the reasons for making friends. By playing games, the child learns to know and share different people, thus producing something in common ground with different people and taking the first step in social life. Families can also find the first clues about the personality of the child through these games and shape their child's education according to these characteristics.
2. Compete with friends:
It is a state of friendship that allows the child to explore his or her own boundaries, to examine the people around him and to compare himself to them. However, since this comparison takes place in the child's inner world, it does not affect the child as an external comparison, the child learns his / her own deficiencies and how to overcome these deficiencies through various experiences.
3. Clash with friend:
It is normal that the child sometimes falls into conflict with friends. When the child is in conflict with a friend, he / she will have the chance to see different ideas and perspectives and prepare himself / herself for different people's thinking.
4. Share your secret with friends:
Like everyone, children want to share events that are important and confidential to them. The child can choose someone with whom he is equal to share this secret (parents are representatives of power, not equal with the child), so his friends are very important and necessary. Children who cannot make such a share feel lonely and weak.
5. Change Friends:
There are two main reasons for this; the ability of the child to choose his or her friends, or the child is impatient and bored quickly from some friendships. Examining the friendship relationship of the child is very important in such a case.
6. Making new friends:
In order to make new friends, it is very important that the social aspect of the child is developed. The child's assertiveness, self-expression and self-confidence play a major role in making friends. Meeting new friends is a recommended situation since it will also cause the child to renew himself or herself.
If there is no solution to the discussions with friends, sometimes the solution is to resent. In such a case, the duty of the family would be the best solution, instead of just looking after the child and thinking that he was right and making the child feel it again, encouraging the child to rethink and understand the subject.
8. Planning the future with friends:
Planning a future with friends is both a very enjoyable activity and a situation that allows children to develop their imagination and to get closer to each other by sharing each other's dreams.
Children develop with friends, dr. Erdal Atabek, Çoluk Children's Magazine, May 2004
Child Development Specialist
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